28th hour blather

So as you are all aware there is a general agreement that there is only 24 hours in a day.

To this I say: true, except if you a long haul truck driver in which case days cease to have a relative time that can be agreed upon by anyone else. While the rest of the world travels through their days in the "normal" 24 hours. We, the truck drivers of America move through 4, 6, 11 hour shifts.

I travel with 2 other drivers in the 18 wheeler that I drive. 1 driving, and 2 sleeping most of the time. When we start out and leave La La Land it is okay as we will start out normally around 6am. I will take the 1st shift and drive for about 5-6 hours. from that point on it rapidily spirals out of the 24 hour periods. When I am awaken next to take my turn driving it could be 9pm, this is my morning and when I am done at 3am that is my bedtime. I cannot compute what day it is, or time it is. All that I ask is "Where are we?" and "which direction are we traveling (North, South, East or West)" that is my life. occassionally we stop to eat. But it is almost more painful to try to determine what day it is and what time it is on that day.

But by doing this I manage never to suffer from "jet-lag" as soon as I stop to do the school and I know what the local time is that is the time for me. And I will be briefly part of that wonderful 24 hour crowd, and then I will be back on the road, and start all over again.

Sorry if this post makes no sense, I was traveling throughout the night and am operating on 5 hours of sleep after being awake for more then 24 hours, on top of being awake for 24 hours.

It's a guy thing

So I was working out in Phoenix and on the second day of 2 days of school that I had out there it was raining like a sonovabitch. And 3 inches of standing water and motorcycles don't mix really well.

So seeing that there was nothing that I could do about the weather or anything for the school until I knew if we were going to try and run or not, I decided to talk to a cute (female) paramedic. One of the many perks of my job. Anyway she is parked a long way away from the rest of the people that were just hanging out.

I get into a bit of banter with her, both of us seeming to feel each other out. Then all of a sudden another guy who works for my company comes up and frickin cock-blocks me. I mean physically moved in between me and the paramedic. Dude you just don't do that. So I leave to go and check on something that I needed to and the guy follows me back, so it wasn't even if he was trying to work something with her.

Then when we had to call the day as it just wasn't going to be able to be done. I went to talk to her again. and just as I get into my groove there the guy is again right at my elbow. I mean he came up like a frickin ninja, he wasn't there and then he was there. And again no good reason for him to be there. I just gave up. Cock-blocked not once but twice, with the same girl, by the same guy in ONE DAY!!!!! Aaaaarrrgh.

He is lucky that I am non-violent, that is all I have to say.

rainy days

So once again it is raining here in "sunny" LaLa Land.

And I hate the rain.

Others will say "well c'mon now Teaspoon, the rain isn't all that bad and the trees sure could use the water" To which I reply with a swift boot to da head. and normally that is all that is said about it. and before everyone tells me how I am just copying Kid Relish I say Nay. This is simply a segway into my actual purpose for this post, not to tell everyone just how many people have fallen to my boot to da head.

See I actually love the way the sky is clear after a good rain. how green the mountains are, etc., my complaint is much more basic then that. It is the fact that rain makes it completely miserable to camp out in a tree for days on end.

"But Teaspoon why would you be camping out in a tree for days on end?" you may ask. To which I shout Aha! see you have fallen into my clever trap and must listen to my futher ranting.

So as anyone but the truely stupid could figure out the reason that you, or me in this case, would camp out in a tree for days on end is that the particular tree that I am camping out in happens to be right across the street from a house in which lives the woman I love. And is it not the purest form of love that would have me, a completely sane individual, some would say living in a tree in the hope of even the slightest glimpse of said woman.

"Okay so if your love is so pure then why don't you just go and talk to her instead of spying on her?" To which, after you reawaken from my boot to your head, I would reply I am not spying, but the restraining order, which was a complete mistake on the courts part, keeps me from going within 50 ft of her home (the tree just so happens to be exactly 50.2ft from the house). I am sure that this will be cleared up very soon.

now you know why I hate the rain. And watch out for my boot to da head, oh sorry too late.

11 again

So I had to go to Costco and Best Buy for work today, man doesn't my job just suck? :-)

in between these two stores rested a Toys R Us. As I was passing by I noticed that there were about 5 or 6 carts full of toys. 90% off all toys in cart a sign said on each cart. And when I looked closer what did I see?

A Masters Of The Universe Castle Greystone. OH MY GOD!!!!! a castle greystone for like 3 bucks. It was one of the hardest things in my life to not buy it then and there.

I think that I may have to go back and pick one up after work.

Girlfriend

So I have been single for awhile now, meaning that I broke up with my last girlfriend back in 2003, man I am going on 2 years now.

Anyways most of my time since then has been taken up with work and I have not had a lot of attention on getting/having another girlfriend. But funny enough the majority of my friends are really worried about it for me. About a month after I broke up with my last girlfriend, one of my friends was asking me when I was going to get a girl. He has this thing about me being single it seems.

So the other day another one of my friends (a woman) asked me what I was looking for in a girlfriend. After a lot of thought I responded with: A stomach, a spleen, 2 lungs, 2 kidneys, etc., I thought that you know was pretty unsuperficial of me you know. I was just looking for a girl that had all of her major organs in place. Is that so wrong? My friend didn't appreciate my answer that much, telling me that I was being bias/prejudice against those women that have lost their appendix, or only had one kidney.

But in all seriousness, no matter what anyone says, men or women, looks matter. I cannot tell you how many times I have been told by my above friend how superficial men are and women are not nearly that into looks and I say bullshit. I am not saying that for women all the men that they wind up dating are really handsome, but for the most part if there is not a physical attraction then women are not going to go up to the guy with the intention of dating him same as men to women.

Before you get all upset I said a physical attraction not that the person is necessarily attractive to everyone. Some guys like the heavy girls, and some girls like the scrawny pale white guys. And so forth, but we each, men and women have our standards. When I hear from some chick or some guy say how looks aren't the most important thing I cry a little bit of bullshit, they may not be the MOST important but they are up there.

The reason that I don't have a girlfriend right now is just because Jessica biel is not returning my calls, but she will. See looks don't matter to me.

this is with a little bit of colour, if you can't figure it out still it is supposed to be Superman, and Lois Lane. 

This is a recent sketch that I did 

It a wonderful make-believe life II

Continued from before.

So my angel, who guess what, is actually named Angelica. Don't laugh or make fun. Trust me you don't want to do that.

So Angelica had just finished showing me how me never being born made my friend Graham's life so much "worse", but even with that failed attempt she was bound and determined to show me how me being born was better for the people in my life and that is how I found myself outside a small private school somewhere in the La La land county. I think that it is worth mentioning that during this "time" I would have been 11. Angelica said something about time being fluid and all this crap, basically she messed up and should have taken me here before the high school but we shall digress.

EXT - Private school. - there are about 16 kids playing soccer on the field next to the building.

Angelica - See Teaspoon look at how much you having never been born has affected those children.

Me - I see a bunch of my friends playing soccer and looking like they are having fun.

Angelica - Yes, but without you there playing goalie for them what would have been your side is losing by a goal more then if you had been here.

Me - We're really scrapping the bottom of the barrel here aren't we?

Angelica - Yes. *bows her head down in shame*

Me - Got anything else.

Angelica - I am so sorry I mean I am trying to show you how great your life was and I am not doing a good job of that at all *starts crying softly* I am really a terrible angel and I won't ever get my wings *cries more*

Me - (great now I have a depressed angel on my hands what the hell am I supposed to do with that?) Now now Angelica, I mean so you have struck out twice in a row, and I mean really badly. *more crying on her part* But hey let's give it another try you know what they say, third times the charm.

Angelica - *sniffling* okay yeah I mean really how boring and meaningless can your life have been?

Me - Nice one *rolling my eyes*

Angelica - What???

Me - Nothing

- PAUSE -

Sorry I need to go to the bathroom, you know call of the wild and all. (Damn shouldn't have ate that chilli last night.)