overflow

See the problem with a Foutain of Useless Knowledge is that every now and then it overflows and then you just have a mess, a big old wet, slippery mess.

why is it that the better it tastes the worst that it is for you and infact most likely could kill you or at least speed up your imminent death? This goes for more then just food, take alchohol, drugs, paint chips, etc..

In Alaska and actually most states, if someone breaks into your house and he gets injured, by their own fault or by you shooting the stupid sonnavabitch, and he gets out of the house he can sue you. So the way the law is written if you are going to cause a burgler bodily harm for breaking into your house make sure you kill him, otherwise he may be living in your house after he sues you and the same stupid jury that let off OJ and MJ award him all of your worldly belongings.

Stupid Question: Why do you park on a driveway and drive on a parkway?

Not-so stupid question: Why is it the more someone says they are not trying to make excuses for a mistake, the more excuses they tell you?

Don't tell someone that you are on the way if you haven't even left your house.

Shit rolls downhill, why does it always feel like I am at the base of Mt. Everest?

PSP is good, PSP is great, PSP the choice of a new generation, I want my P.S..P., PSP phone home, Frankly PSP I don't give a damn. What do youo mean you think I have a problem? Alot of people sleep with PSPs there is nothing WRONG WITH IT!

We are at our most couragious after the fact, "Man if he had done something like that to me I would have kicked his ass" yeah right you would have curled up in a ball and most likely peed yourself shut the eff up!

I think that first dates should be handled like job interviews with resumes and everything.

Why do people insist on telling me "and you wonder why you're single"? No damnit I don't wonder why, I know exactly why and none of it is my fault.

personalized ringtones are getting way out of hand, I now have "Bring out you dead" from Monty Python on my phone, and I am talking about the whole friggin scene. I laugh my ass off everytime my phone rings now.